What the Western Morning News describes as a fun-loving pensioner has spent hundreds of pounds transforming his electric mobility scooter into a Rolls-Royce. Apparently Bill Inston, 83, spent months tinkering with the vehicle, which has a top speed of 8mph, to give the battery powered scooter a mahogany interior finish, removable Perspex roof and traditional Rolls-Royce grille, made from knitting needles and tin foil. Inston said he wanted to add a bit of style to the seafront at Weston-super-Mare. Style? Weston-super-Mare? It will take more than that!
Meanwhile the Western Mail reveals that Crad Jones, a chip shop owner, was tucking into his lunch when an image of the late comedian Tommy Cooper appeared before him. Jones, who owns the Codfather’s Plaice in Caerphilly, said: “I got my pie, which I have with chips and peas, and noticed the resemblance of Tommy Cooper on the bottom of it. The comparison was amazing.” As Tommy would say – “Just like that!”
The Edinburgh Evening News tell us that a woman who was caught having sex with a man in a police station car park said her behaviour was completely out of character — because she’s gay. “It was him that was trying it on with me,” she told an Edinburgh court. “I didn’t know him, and I haven’t seen him since.” It was probably the kilt that confused her.
AND A BIT OF THE BLARNEY
Auf Wiedersehen Pet? BBC News tells us the phrase has taken on a new meaning after two cats were found to have travelled from Germany to Northern Ireland. The animals were found straying in Coleraine, County Londonderry, five weeks ago. They were brought to a vet in Limavady and so far attempts to contact their owners have been unsuccessful as they were micro-chipped and tattooed in Germany. The central agency that deals with microchips, Petlog, were able to tell the vet they came from Germany but the problem is, German vets can’t release the name of the owners because of confidentiality. So how did they get to Ireland? Obviously a cat’s tail!
AND A TASTE OF WHAT WE ARE MISSING!
The Daytona Beach News Journal reports that a UPS delivery driver was arrested after allegedly stealing $53,000 worth of expensive sunglasses he was supposed to deliver to a client. Instead he sold them to friends because he “needed the money”. His name is Brandon Loser – Loser by name, Loser by nature!
